regret

photograph by james cater, 2019

my love always ends in regret

i talk with hands         retreat

return              hold my breath

tears prickle    breasts

the sound of my voice hardens

in your spine               there is the threat

of hands          you are my mother

obliged to love me      i forget

that love is trying        taught

that love          is holding        taught that love

is dying

until my tongue           hooked

in your mouth             opens up

your teeth        and lets the words

slip out                                    calcified

like a year       that hurts to breathe